Thursday, August 28, 2014

Fibromyalgia & Sleep Disfunction...

One of the issues I've had my whole life is trouble sleeping. I'm not talking NOT sleeping - but not deep, body healing sleep. As a child I had nightmares - every night the same 3, full color, full sound, in the same order. Two of those dreams were waking dreams - I didn't see the images but I felt their movement. I hate being rushed from one place to the next - that is what one of those dreams was. I felt like I was being pushed along and I couldn't slow down while my surroundings were going past me at a faster pace and it made me feel awful. The other dream something (usually a garbage truck - hey, I was 3-4 years old) was trying to crush me or eat me. To this day I hate things that tower over me - or are empty under me. I hate not feeling secure.

When I was 14 I begged God to take away the dreams - and He did.

Unfortunately when I begged Him for peaceful dreaming I didn't realize that we need to reach a dream state (REM) in order for our bodies to heal. Over the last 30 years I can count the number of dreams I've had on 1 hand. Literally. Again the few dreams I've had over the last 30 years are vivid, full color, full sound and often I feel like I'm falling. (Sometimes I have that falling feeling when I'm awake too.)

Being a Fibromyalgia patient I do have the sleep issues many of us do. I've noticed Brain Fog, difficulty understanding written words and especially verbal instruction. I struggle with basic remembering. (An example is: putting the wet bag for diapers, my purse and the diaper bag on the edge of the trunk and after putting the stroller in the trunk turning and picking up my purse & diaper bag and not even realizing the wet bag was gone. To this day, I still can't find it. It's so frustrating to be looking at something and 2 minutes later have no memory of it whatsoever.) This is scary to me - how bad can I expect it to get? 

Along with the inability to remember things - I've noticed a bone deep achiness & tiredness, stiffness in the morning, exhaustion and frustration with noise, my surroundings, idiots (you get the idea)... I've noticed when I get that tired it's just better to separate myself from others. To almost hibernate in my apartment after the kiddos got home and surround myself with silence until I get enough sleep to tolerate noise again. It almost feels like I'm deep under water and I'm struggling to swim through jello..

In June, I tried something new..... stay tuned and I'll tell you whats been helping me.

Articles you might find interesting:
Fibromyalgia & Sleep by Jan Sheehan

Sleep Disorders

Hopefully linking up to:
Missional Women 

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